Project Management: Back door and pantry, and the results...

 So, in the midst of everything we were going through, we did what we typically do, start another project.  I truly think that my husband did this to get his mind off of what we were going through, and to have things to talk about with his patients and people he met other than to talk about the fact he didn't have children.

We wanted to get French doors on the back since we bought the house.  

I can imagine that having to tell people you meet constantly, "no we don't have any little ones" and then for them to ask "why not, or do you want any" knowing that you do, and that currently your wife is going through a torturous 12 days of waiting to find out whether she is pregnant or not, and how much time and money you just spent to possibly not have it work.  Its exhausting to even think that, and smiling each day is hard.  

Then we added a pantry in the front of the house, in the "sitting room" that is o so not useful!  Its great, we keep extra food, the vacuum, all our appliances for the kitchen, towels, sheets, games, our winter coats that we may never wear again in Florida but want to have them for when we travel north, and light bulbs!  Its a great use of space, and I am proud of my hubby for coming up with the design! I got to paint the room purple, the door yellow for ECU, and the side in the hallway chalk paint so I can draw and write all over it.  Its such a great use of space!!  I love it!  And it got our minds off of things.  

12 days later, tested, and we got a positive.  We were so excited, we just couldn't believe it worked, we were pregnant.  It was surreal!  Of course when you first find out, you are scared and excited, all kinds of emotions.  

So we went to the doc, to test the levels, they were ok.  They told me to come back in 2 days, they needed to double and things would be looking good.  2 days past, and I went back in for more tests.  I waited all day for the call, just to find out, my levels didn't double, they actually went down a few points.  They wanted to test me again in 2 days, it may have just been a bad reading. 

2 days later, back in, more tests, then the call.  Levels had dropped again.  I was going to loose it.  It had only been 3 weeks since we did the procedure.  They told me to just be prepared for my period to start any day now.  Well, it didn't, I went another 2 weeks with nothing, and the 6th week I finally started bleeding.  It took 6 weeks for the embryo to leave me.  We were devastated.  

Then, I had to wait this out, 3 weeks of bleeding.  I know this is graphic, but it was.  It was heavy, and painful, in many ways, physically and emotionally.  My levels dropped so they didn't feel a need to do a D&C, so we waited things out.  This was August at this point, mid summer, the weather was hot but gorgeous, and we decided we needed a vacation.  We had just gone through IVF, and a miscarriage, and I didn't know if I could ever do it again.